And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
She posts like 3 statuses a day pleading for pity. Responding positively would be like giving a dog a treat for shitting on the floor.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
You went streaking and came back with your shirt inside out. Then said "it happens in the line of duty" and passed out.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
I know her cup size but not her name....
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
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