so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
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