I want to have your abortion
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
As shirtless as possible
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Randomize
