I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Cleaned the whole house at 7:30 and after cleaning the bathroom I think I had cocaine on my sweatpants
Dick very happy bro
Randomize