I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
