Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
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