weddingsv make me drug and hornr
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
you trust me enough to eiffel tower a girl but don't trust me with a mallet wtf happened to our friendsship
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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