WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
"can of pringles" is totally a legitimate measure of time
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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