there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
We're learning about the color wheel. Hello college.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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