Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Wake your sexy ass up. It's donut time.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
Randomize
