the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
