turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
We just shotgunned beers for America
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
Randomize
