using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Just got the American Express annual summary for 2009. The amount of bars we visited last year is impressive.
We did lines off of a Whitney Houston CD case. That makes everything okay.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
Everclear isn't food dammit
Holy shit last night was like the irresponsible Olympics for me
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Randomize
