Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
So we get back to the hotel room and Tom strips off his clothes... His first sexual act as my fiance? Helicopter dick. I gave him a high five.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
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