just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
It's after midnight. I didn't find the answer to my problem, but I did find the bottom of a bottle of vodka, so... there's that.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
