We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
Dude the animal human society told us we could get a dog when we came back sober. I cant wait.
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
Dave used his AAA card to get my car towed to my house so I could get drunk. Evil genius.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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