I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
I'd introduce you to the guys, but you'd probably make them all fall in love with you
I could do with a Floridian man-harem. Let's do this.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize
