my sisters under your porch take her home
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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