I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
So his shoes are still here. And there are three contacts in a case. And a shirt on the bed. I've checked my dorm and he's not here. I'm so confused.
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
Randomize