Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I am a figure skater. You should know better than to let me get drunk near any patches of ice during Olympics season.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
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