just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
The smiley face on that pregnancy test is so damn taunting. It's like it's laughing at me for my poor choices.
I just found puke in my bra..
When I come over I'm bringing "Socky" the Alcoholism Prevention puppet, today he is going to tell you boys about his FAVORITE word---its called "moderation"
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
He did a backflip because drugs
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize