Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
Passing out is my livers way of protecting my mind.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
They are going to name an STD after you.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
