If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
just woke up. hair smells like weed and bbq. shins are bruised. vague memory of us chasing deer at the park at 3 am. fill me in on what exactly happened.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
It's acceptable to bring him back to my parents house and fuck on the couch right??
If I ever drink whiskey again make sure I don't eat the plastic cups that I'm drinking them from.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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