I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
This is the prime rib incident all over again
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
I’m ready to be reckless and make stupid decisions, and I need you to support me in that.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
