what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
I dressed up as a breathalyzer test for Halloween; never had so many straight dudes blow me before!
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
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