I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
