Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
my mom asked me why i was covered in scratches, blood, and dirt this morning..i answered "i was planking obviously" and walked away
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
I'm sorry I walked in on you guys, but all I heard from outside was her screaming "Dive, dive!". Sex was my last guess for what was going on in there.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
