Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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