If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
They pay me enough to pretend to be either helpful, or heterosexual. If they want both I need one hell of a raise.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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