im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
the condom got lost in my hair
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
