I didn't know that people actually queef. Is this a real thing?
I believe so, yes.
Would you be offended if I asked if it has happened to you?
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
Randomize
