fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
The man who lives downstairs is fluent in Russian, and also a playboy. You should meet.
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
You start to question your morals when you wake up at 430 and there's three people naked...that you don't no
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Randomize
