ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
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