i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
I just had a 2 1/2 hr conversation about the pros and cons of taping your ballsack to your taint, which then led into the unveilling of lady gaga being a hermaphrodite.
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
She guessed my name 9 times, and 5 of those times she guessed Mike. Figured that'd be an easy target for the night.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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