if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
I joined a mariachi band. they gave me a guitar because i told them i could play. It actually turned out ok
They kicked me out of the mariachi band. Turns out I'm not that good
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
