I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Male strippers are involved. You are coming
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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