Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I was too lazy to get my chapstick out of my purse so i lubed up my lips with pizza grease. On a scale of 1-10 how embarassed should i be?
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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