i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
How does one acquire holy water?
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
