I wanna bring you to show and tell
I need to shower the guilt off of my thighs.
we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
You wore a man's plastic top hat last night.
No I didn't. Whiskey did.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
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