hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
i signed up to donate 10 dollars a month to help the children that are being displaced in columbia because of the drug wars.. i felt obligated
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
