I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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