I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
i wonder if i could find a boyfriend who would call me big papa
sure if you go to prison
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
I made out with him with my retainers in. My drunken hook-ups get lazier and lazier.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
Randomize
