No. Especially when my uncle started stripping. Too many shots. So that's where I get that from.
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
Strip clubs just aren't as fun when a man tries to drunkenly grind on you.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
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