i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
