worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
And really all I wanted was to be like "hey can I borrow your dick for a few hours this weekend?"
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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