Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
