If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
you went all the way to UK and still managed to hook up with someone from our highschool...
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
