i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
I think making out with someone could be the cure to all my problems. That or more cowbell.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
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