lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
I hope after we constantly bang for 2 days straight we can agree to be friends again
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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