Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
You just can't come from being "the girl who shit her pants."
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I'm 99% sure I just puked glitter. Wine drunk Mondays shouldn't be a thing.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I'm only wearing socks and eating tuna, don't do this to me right now.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
PSA- Wearing assless chaps results in embarrassingly painful sunburn
Randomize
